Retiring to Mazatlan: Termites

Hub comes running out of the garage. The garage he had specially built to house his beloved car and bike. Waving a piece of wood he announces...‘Quick!!! They’re invading!’

Stopping him before he hurts himself, I ask...“What? You're telling me that wood is invading us?”

Standing back I watch as Hub flaps his arms like a sports coach, yelling...‘Tenemos muchas termitas en todo!!!’

Having heard similar stuff before from Hub, I stand up calmly, reach out my hand and introduce myself..
“Hello. I'm Linda and I’m Canadian. Speak English!”

‘Knock it off Linda. We have termites!’ as he points to the piece of wood he’s been hording for over a year. ‘Look! Holes!’

“Ohhh is that all. I thought carpenters were invading us. But yes, they are mighty fine holes.”

‘You know they’ll infest everything!’

“Let me get this right...wood termites are going to infest my house, your garage and the courtyards? You do know we are in Mexico, the land of concrete, right?”

‘Well yes, there are such creatures as concrete termites, but these here, these are wood termites.’ Hub explains patiently.

“Well, I have the solution. Throw out the damn piece of wood! Problem solved.”

Returning to the garage, Hub starts moving everything in sight...

and then, he runs like the wind, back into the house...‘Get outta my way!!!!’

Grabbing his “spray gear” to do battle, Hub locks himself in his garage and goes about killing anything that moves.

After an hour he throws open the door, followed by a plume of smoke, and he announces... ‘mission accomplished!’

“Did you save any of the wood?” I ask from comfy chair on the deck.

‘No. But I defy any living bug to come in the doors and live!’I watch him make his way into the house, all confident and stuff!

After a day of shopping I come in through the garage, and peek around the corner... “Hey terminator! There’s an old cockroach trying to cross your line of defense in the garage!”